Kids who are physically abused grow up into human armadillos. Beating up your kid is a super-common practice in West Bengal, India.

Apparently, there’s some kind of saying, “Spare the rod and spoil the child”, which these parents take very seriously.
Like their lives depended on it.

I remember my Mum, burning my bottom lip with a hot iron, while she pressed clothes, because I was scribbling on the walls in crayon. Age two.

I remember Mum dislocating my shoulder. Age five. Thank Goodness that left no permanent damage. It would have really sucked because I’m right-handed.

I remember my Dad lashing at my arms with a leather belt when I was seven. Because I’d spilled water on my homework. Or maybe because I didn’t really finish it and spilled the water on purpose to cover up the unfinished homework.

I remember my Dad picking me up and hurling me bodily at the glass fronted wall cabinets filled with showy crockery. Because the nine year old me had flunked a math test.

Smash. Smash. Glass splintering.

Fast forward to my late teens. I got beat up because I fell in love with people who were not doctors. I got beat up because I didn’t do well in med school, where they pushed me into. I got beat up and called names by my own parents.

My Mum would ask me to go prostitute myself because I’d worn lipstick and apparently people who are doctors, in India, don’t wear lipstick. She still says that. Sigh.

Slap. Slap. Hair pulling. Bruises on my arms from trying to protect my face.

Liar. B-words. Mum throwing me to the floor and stomping on my throat trying to kill me. I, the survivor, (oh what a b*tch, she is ruining our family’s name, she’s embarrassing us, why can’t you go hang yourself?) – survived.

It sucks when your parents don’t want you. It’s better to do your kids a giant favor, dear lovely abusive parents, and NOT have kids at all. I would be at least look-at-able without my scars.

I will always survive. Alone.

Love xx

Advertisements

17 thoughts on “Battered-Baby Syndrome.

      1. Talking about it really helps. You will find kindness and grace in unexpected places. And better than that you give hope to many who are still stuck in the rut!

        Liked by 1 person

      1. I can understand this! If you walked this far, you will overcome and shine!
        Something I live by -Rage! Rage! against the dying of the light!

        Liked by 1 person

  1. LR, that was so difficult to read. I’m amazed by your resiliency and your fortitude, and I’m saddened by what has happened to you as a child. Children need a loving and supportive environment to grow in and to be nurtured by. Striking and hurting only makes home a place of fear.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You replied to me! ๐Ÿ˜ Ahem. No, you’ll NEVER be that person because you’re rejecting it. It’s those who accept that treatment as ‘normal’ that will perpetuate it. It is NOT true – you have the opportunity to change it and you will.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Nothing is ‘unfixable’. All fixing comes down to is recognizing what is broken and then follow up by changing it. You know what is broken, so now you do it differently. I know I’m over simplifying it.

        Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s