I apologize for not posting yesterday – I was so tired from all that pizza I ate, I just happened to keel over and fall asleep.

*Males, you might wanna keep out now*

With mascara on.

And when I woke up in the morning, I looked like a cross between Death and A BABY PROSTITUTE, rolled in chopped grossity.

Do not go to sleep with eye makeup on, people. Like, ever. And a giant no no no no no if you happen to wear mascara that’s not waterproof.

If you have, then Lord help you.

I hate it how I’ve got this relationship with mascara, where I can’t live without it, and then I want to kill it, at the same time.

image
Yep. Me.

Like, come on.

Why the wand? Serious eye-poke hazard right there. It’s a health risk, y’all. Bits of mascara that come in contact with your conjunctiva could sometimes lead to conji – conjunctivitis to you plebs.

And trust me, your eye does not appreciate constant threat of inflammations.

Trying to find the perfect mascara is like Taylor Swift dating ten million guys before she finally finds a man who actually matches her awesomeness.

Which is hard, you guys. She’s with Calvin Harris now – kinda like my situation where I’m with Urban Decay’s perversion mascara now and it’s not waterproof so it’s definitely not perfect for accidentally falling asleep in.

How long would it take for my over fluttered head to wrap itself around the fact that OMG MASCARA AIN’T NO PAJAMA PANTS! YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED RO GET COMFY!?

Probably a gazillion more pink eye attacks. Ugh.

There’s also the other bad part about mascara where wands are the only option. I wish it came with some other forms of application, you know? Like airbrush makeup. Too unreal.

While it makes your eyelashes look and fan out like a peacock’s spectacular plumage while it’s doing a rain-dance, it also makes them feel like chips. All crunchy and gross. And stiff and unnatural. Bleeaaarrgghh.

*deep breath*

Why, Mascara, Why? Sometimes I just hate to love you.

Rant over. This was such a moronic-meets-whattheeff post. Hahaha.

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81 thoughts on “Why, Mascara, Why?

      1. Totally! !though it was a cheap one and it sucks n when I watered my eyes I felt like a jilted gal friend 😝😝😝

        L’OrΓ©al seems good ,my sister is fan of it

        Liked by 2 people

      2. I have never actually used any of this but per my sister all the stuff you mentioned are imp!! 😁😁
        For me a blush on can do wonders πŸ˜€ ahhhh πŸ™‚

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Hahah nude lipstick sounds good but I like a peachy like
        And orangish brown πŸ™‚
        Yeah I like wearing makeup seldom otherwise I would look too mainstream office main and my lead will be like *aj shadi hai na iss ki * :p 😒😒😒

        Liked by 1 person

  1. Cute post….

    Some males are braver than others… Such as those of us with two sisters…

    Two thoughts…

    From the standpoint of this male, at least, I think most women look best in the least makeup possible, merely enhancement to natural looks, for the simple reason kissing all that gunk is no fun… I understand the allure of certain styles of making up, and appreciate the beauty it can enhance in women (being one who can appreciate looking without having to touch…), especially for occasions when men & women are together for other than intimacy, but, for show (going to a ball, or a formal dance, etc…). Otherwise, for everyday, I much prefer, and most men would agree, no makeup at all… Very few of you need it for other than formality…

    Second, with that in mind, perhaps if you punctuate the same questions this way, you’d change your way of thinking, or, at least obsessing about it…

    “Why mascara? Why?”

    A bit different, but, also open to obsession, which in you, is particularly cute… and, gives you something to rant about, too….

    πŸ™‚

    gigoid, tongue slightly in cheek…

    P.S. If this is too serious for you, just imagine if I had tried to comment on the various qualities and characteristics of one or more of the mascara brands you mentioned…. It would have put y’all to sleep halfway through…

    Have fun in the mirror…

    with tongue now lodged firmly in cheek

    gigoid

    😎

    Like

  2. I have tried probably every mascara out there for my blonde barely there lashes. My current fave, even over DIOR n MAC? Its L’Oreal Voluminous False Fiber Lashes in Waterproof Black. N yes even after washing my face at night n morning n only wearing on top lashes, I still have some black left lol. So I use these things that look like qtips from almay n clear rest of black before moisturizing n doing whole thing over again πŸ˜‰

    Liked by 1 person

  3. If you ever want men to stop reading something you never say men check out here, LR. Every man in the universe read the whole dang post. Because you didn’t want us to. Did we understand it? No way! I felt like I was reading the part of the Chinese restaurant menu they put on there for either the workers or decorative purposes. Who would name a product Urban Decay? Gaaaaaaack! Have a good day. ❀

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Apparently a person called Wende Zomnir did. Named their brand Urban Decay, I mean.. And oooooooh, Sooch got men reading about mascara. How awesome!!!! And do not gaaaaaaaaaaak one of my favorite brands!

      Like

  4. I just want you to know…that this is my life. I want to wash my mascara off right now to be honest, but I’m too busy catching up on my favorite reads-soooo I’ll probably be reliving this one in the a.m.

    Excellent post.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Beauty is pain so they say! Haha, I fall asleep with waterproof eyeliner and mascara on quite often..it’s tragic! But I love my eye liner and mascara.. even if I wake up looking like a villainous prostitute at times… haha ❀

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Haha… I can so relate to this! It pains me when I have to part with an eyelash… and all because my damned mascara clings to my eyelashes like some parasite that won’t take the hint. :-\ That, and waking up with panda eyes! …saying this, I feel totally naked without it!

    Great post πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

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