A friend totally inspired this blog post. You know who you are, so please don’t kill me if you’re reading this. I love my life, no matter how much I seem to complain about it.

It’s already been established that I have crazy friends. Birds of a feather, and all that. So this cray cray whack job calls me – completely out of the blue – to tell me this, quote:

Friend: Boy, I’m so glad I never had anal.

Me: What in the world?!

Friend: I’m serious. I had this poopmergency today and –

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Said friend's situation.

Me: Uh oh.

Friend: WILL YOU LISTEN?! I had to walk a mile to get to the nearest mall. I’m so glad my anal sphincter is tight, you know? Imagine if it wasn’t. Man, I’ve never been so happy. Seeing an unoccupied loo. And that commode. Heaven. *sigh*

Me: *dying with laughter* oh. Dear. God.

Unquote.

Yes, this actually happened. I’m not even exaggerating. Speaking of sphincters and loomergencies – which includes peemergencies and poopmergencies – I have a bit of an advice for you. Do NOT pout for selfies. Pouts resemble… well, you know what I mean.

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See what I mean?

At this point you’re supposed to give me a tap on the back, for being so brave, and actually posting this picture. Now you also know why, possibly, nobody is ever gonna snog me. And my bad teeth don’t help.

Is anyone else here a germophobe and scared to death of public washrooms? I keep thinking if I ever died an unnatural death, it would totally be from urinary tract infection. I’m not even kidding. One way to avoid it is to do what I do, if you have an absolute loomergency.

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Which is this.

You DO realise I’ve run out of ideas for posts at the moment, right? Might as well surrender and go back to doing this:

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Penny makes no-shower-for-days look sexy.

Meanwhile, I got tagged to do the Liebster thing – this time by Shweta from https://themissshweta.wordpress.com. Go check out her amazing blog!

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Her questions:

1) What really makes you happy?

Blogging. Hands down.

2) What keeps you motivated?

My desire to get the Hell out of the country.

3) If you were a super hero what would your hero name be?

Bohemian Crapsody. It doesn’t make any sense what-effing-soever. But I’m boho. Ish. And I talk a ton of crap. As is evident here.

4) If you could go back in time to change one thing what would it be?

Med-school thing. I’d pick fashion photography or journalism instead.

5) If you could live anywhere, where would that be?

Sligo, Ireland. Westlife originated there. Don’t judge me!

6) Whats your favourite condiment?

Mint.

7) Whats your most & least favourite word?

Most favorite – two words actually, it’s more like a phrase “sucks bananas”.

Least favorite – “planning”. Dude. don’t plan. Do. DO.

8) If you could ask your future self one question what would it be?

Will I be happy?

9) What’s the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had?

About botox with Dad’s colleague. Incidentally, botox sucks bananas. Do not get those shots.

10) If you could learn any language fluently what would it be?

Spanish. It sounds so hot. Also the guys are hot.

I’ve got a blogger’s block right now and I’m unable to come up with questions. I know this makes me sound like Cruella De Vil, but there are only so many questions you can come up with. So, Hallelujah – you’re all spared!

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72 thoughts on “Loomergencies and Other Random Stuff.

  1. You are SO funny!! I came on over here seeing how Mark just nominated you in a challenge he accepted from me. I hope you accept, for I had a blast with it, in fact, still going, my fifth post being the morrow. I also discovered aspects of me I did not know existed and how much more exciting can it get then that? I also followed you to see IF you accept this challenge, which I do so hope you do. GRIN!!! Love, Amy ❤

    Liked by 2 people

      1. OH GOOD!!! Please IF I do not see you in my reader due to being busy replying to the many comments that come my way, PLEASE come to Petals, leave a short comment so I SEE you and I will immediately come straight on over to your blog. I look forward in seeing what you do with this challenge. I had SO MUCH FUN with it, and in fact, I am working on day 5 right now!!! LOL I laugh due to what I plan on putting on Petals tomorrow. My work amazes me!!! Hehehehe I am so grateful to Mark for introducing us!!! YAY!!!! (((HUGS))) Amy ❤

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Mark and I call each other ….. I am the cousin from the west and he is the cousin from the east. LOL He lives in Syracuse and I live near Buffalo, so we have claimed cousinship to each other, not living too far from one another in the same state. I agree, Mark is a sweetheart indeed. And thank YOU for helping me make sure I see you. The number of comments I answer and write myself, I honestly don’t know how I do what I do. LOL I must LOVE reaching out with LOVE. And yes, I have a sense of humor that rocks too!!! Hehehehehe LOVE your energy and the way you write … I really am sitting on the edge of my seat waiting to see what you do with this challenge. Man, I am SO glad Mark nominated you. My first person who I nominated backed out of it. The one I nominated today I got a maybe. Mark is a sure. Dan is a sure. And I HOPE tomorrow’s post my fifth will be a sure. This really is fun and now I am SO glad I have something to look forward to in watching both Mark and you, and Dan too beginning tomorrow. I was getting sad coming to the finish of this challenge. FYI … I pushed Mark out of the nest ….. *giggle* …. But he told me he is up to a challenge and because I challenged him he is going for it with gusto. I LOVED his first post today!!! LOL

        Liked by 2 people

      3. *jealous* *pout* Well, I suppose I will just have to be satisfied with kissin’ cousins. Hehehehehehe You are seriously too much, and OH do I look forward to your future posts for this challenge and so much more. I am really glad to have met you today. You don’t know it, but you honestly made me grin, made me laugh, and brightened my day in many ways. Thank YOU!!!! ❤

        Liked by 1 person

      4. Who cares what peeps think? Perhaps the grinning chipmunk will affect those around “her” and give others a reason to grin! This world needs more smiles! Speaking of which, I am just about to put up my 5th post right now for this challenge. And it is all about smiles …… 🙂 ❤

        Liked by 1 person

      5. PS WP reader I SO agree with you there …. *pulls hair out with you* …. on second thought better not do that. I need all the hair I can get at this stage of Life. *LOUD GIGGLES*

        Liked by 1 person

      6. And dancing bananas I would really LOVE to see since I eat two per day …. Should I train them to dance into my smoothie while I sing and dance a jig? Just picturing it is making me laugh …. LOL

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Omg… 😱😍😍😍😍😍
    Which blind bat doesn’t snog you?????
    If I wasn’t straight,I’d be doing that right now.. Yeah like snogging slurpy at the phone.. Because, I don’t believe in the virtual thing if I may suggest so.. 😁😁
    Can we have a blog post about how pretty art thou??? Like for real..

    Liked by 2 people

      1. Paper was kind of blehhh even though I had studied so much. :/ But then didn’t screw up too badly. Atleast I hope I didn’t. Harper’s..? No way. I would have to disown myself. We have this shitty text book Rafi prescribed for us. LOL. 😀

        Liked by 1 person

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