I was watching this TV show called Younger, and how the lead character Liza Miller, at 40, falls for a twenty six year old.

My super orthodox Mum pointed out that was super crazy because the guy was fifteen years younger. So I told her about this person I know that has always dated guys more than half a decade younger than she happened to be at that point. And how people would say mean stuff like “She likes her meat young!” What the badooshes does that even mean!? And my Mum just rolled her eyes. I kid you not.

It’s love. It’s a relationship. It’s not a research paper.

Or is it?

So I asked Mum why did she find it so awkward. She obviously freaked out, and the first thing she wanted to know was if I happened to be dating someone half my age. I was very strongly tempted to say Yes Mum, I’m a pedophilic girlfriend, but refrained. You know, with being in her good books and all.

She threw some weird logic my way.

Apparently, the mental age of an eighteen year old girl is the same as the mental age of a twenty one year old dude. This basically means that girls mature faster emotionally as well. Does this also mean that in order for you and your boyfriend to see eye to eye, there needs to be a three year age gap, minimum?

I told her that it was a stupid logic. She gave me the eye. (Mum needs to stop doing this. It still makes me want to pee my pants.) How many of you agree with my Mommykins?

In my opinion, however, age is seriously just a number. How does it affect relationships if you’re with a younger guy? Or if your guy is twenty years your senior? I thought love, and shenanigans, come with no boundaries. And there’s this other thing. Marriage. Babies. Everyone in India makes a giant deal out of it. I’m almost 25, and my relatives are fake-panicking. When I have kids at age thirty plus, I will smack the doctor that tells me I’m a super old Mommy, cause I’d be a fun Mommy. Never mind how old. Besides, I don’t want to grow up. I wanna stay fourteen twenty four, for now.

(Note to self: You know you’re finally a grown up when you can actually make your own decisions and get rid of the jerk magnet on your forehead.)

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...and it's probably happening. Soon.

Have you dated an older woman? Or a younger guy? What’s your take on this?

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102 thoughts on “Is Age Just A Number?

  1. I don’t know about that. There’s a girl in my class who is 22 or 23 and she’s with a dude who is 46. That dude can be her father! He’s older than both of my parents and I’m 24! I’d be damn if I hooked up with a woman close to the same age as my mom. I’d be bullshit if I found out my mother was hooking up with someone my age. Wouldn’t you?

    Liked by 1 person

  2. My 24 year old son is living with a 36 year old woman who has a teen age daughter. Not married, of course (what can I say, I’m old school). Through this relationship I have the most precious granddaughter. I adore her. I also love my son. The issue for me is the fact she’s still married to her daughter’s father. But, to keep to your question – yes, I can get past the age thing .. mostly.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. While your mother’s opinion has some merit, it is not a rule without exception. Love knows no boundaries’ is closer to the truth. For example, when Bogie and Bacall got together, during the filming of To Have and Have Not, she was 19, he was in his late forties. They were married almost immediately, staying married until he died. I don’t believe she married again.

    There are a lot of obstacles to marriages with large age gaps, but, they aren’t necessarily insurmountable. My own father was nine years older than my mother, and they would still be married, were they alive; they had 42 years, and my mom never married, living another twenty years or so…

    So, there’s no telling…. when love hits, it overcomes whatever obstacles there are….

    gigoid

    Liked by 3 people

      1. “Harold and Maude.”… She probably saw it, and was offended… but, it’s a beautiful movie, bizarre as it is…. I stand by what I said; it’s all up to the two involved, and anyone else’s opinion will be ignored, anyway…. THAT is the blindness they speak of…. True love is blind to age, or physical appearance, or any other factor but two hearts….

        gigoid, the closet romantic

        Liked by 1 person

  4. I agree, age is only a number. When I was in my teens (many, many moons ago) I had a ‘thing’ for the older man… I even briefly went on a date with a 29 year old man… The age gap was very apparent, though, and sadly it didn’t work out 😐(I may have got a little to drunk and puked on his lap) ….But moving on! I don’t see any problems with it. As long as both love each other and ulterior motives aren’t involved, then why the heck not?!

    …You’ve inspired me again for a future topic! Thanks πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘

    Liked by 2 people

  5. The “age doesn’t matter thing” still trips me out. And admittedly, I am (as a woman/gal), dating something 14 years my senior. Is it a little weird? I can’t lie and say it’s all completely kosher feeling. But we’ve been together 4 years so far and while a lot of it has been painful and trying, it’s also been pretty goddamn wonderful. The age gap is totally trick ground to tread across, but I don’t think it has to be a complete barrier to love and connection at all.

    Good post! And a Ryan Gosling meme is always a plus.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. My 1st girlfriend was almost an year elder to me. πŸ˜› So I dont feel anything when you tell me about age and relationship when it’s plus minus 3 years. But anything over that I cannot judge or comment on that.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. It depends on the two people that are in the relationship in question. My ex was 13 years older than I and he was much more immature than I am. It didn’t work out, needless to say, mostly because he’s an idiot. A lot of our issues did have to do with the age difference, but only because he was too old to be such a damn fool. My current boyfriend is 8 years older than I am and he’s amazing.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I don’t know if I completely agree with your mum. I know women my age who are pretty immature and I know guys my age who are immature too. And I don’t see any reason why women get to mature faster than men. So the only truth is, “the world is crazy, just live with it.” Lol

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Yes, I do agree that age is just a number both literally and philosophically. One of the most important things is that you see things in the same manner and that you are both growing in the same direction. Oh and I have dated both those my senior and junior and have found no difference if the aforementioned is true.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I think as we get older, we get more comfortable with an age gap. Like an 18 year old and a 14 year old in a relationship is weird, but a 29 year old with a 25 year old isn’t, even though the gap is still 4 years. That being said, everyone has their own preference and age becomes just a number if two people just really get along. Dr. Paul, signing off.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. The benefit of dating a younger man, as a woman, in an until-death-do-us-part relationship, is that you are less likely to outlive the guy and be a sad old widow. But that would be a disadvantage if you’re the type who’s going to be a cool crazy happy old widow, I guess.

    Like

  12. I totally agree with you and my mother( I’m sorry I know not many people call their mom’s mother but I have a habit) literally told me the exact same thing, she said that guys mature late blah blah.. At least I’m not the only one who thinks age doesn’t matter :p

    Liked by 1 person

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