I’m a fighter. Or at least I used to be. I used to be confident, almost cocky, when it came to…

…dust. Obviously.

What did you expect I was talking about? My tons and tons of failed relationships? Naw.

Welcome to WTF Wednesday where I attempt to douse you with some weird, typical Soochumor. Yes, I’m like the smurfs. I use ‘Sooch’ in everything. Deal with it.

So the struggle this morning began with me trying to perfect my eyebrows. I did one and it turned out like one of those sexy tattooed brows from the Anastasia Beverly Hills Instagram page, and I had an amazing time doing it (by it I mean putting on my a makeup, you perv) with some Shayne Ward in the background. Shane Ward songs serve as background music while I’m in the process of painting my face, by the way. What’s yours?

Anyway, back to what I was saying.

And THEN I started on my other brow and God knows where this giant gust of wind came from, but suddenly instead of eyebrows I had eye-antlers.

Story of my life. It took me ten minutes to redo my whole entire bloody eyebrow. Speaking of eyebrows, did you know that men have sexy ones? There’s this kid on my Instagram whose brows are actual goals. BETTER THAN CARA DELEVINGNE’S, I swear. (He’s also British, but old enough to be my kid so that’s a bummer.)

Back to my rambling, I’m doing my very first swap, ever. I’m not sure how to even explain this. But I’m super excited! So I went to get her candy and once I got home and I was in the process of getting her box ready, I saw that the stupid box of candy had run past the expiry date. What the actual f*ck?! Even though technically, it was my fault, since I didn’t check the date. Anyway, have any of you ever done a swap? Let me know!


7 thoughts on “WTF Wednesday – #18

  1. I don’t do my eyebrows, so I can’t feel your pain, but I think I can empathize with you. Like when a child bursts in the bathroom with a question that just can’t wait, the door smacks your arm, and you gouge your neck with the razor. That kinda thing, I imagine. I won’t go into men having sexy eyebrows 😉 – but I will say my son’s eyelashes are MUCH longer than the ones either of my daughters have.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Eye brows are my passion and my demise. One day they are beautiful bitch brows and the next they are sparse and uneven. Like, my 18 year old self eye brows. SO yeah. I have never done a swap but that sounds really frickin amazing!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I remember our convo! That’s why I had to read your post immediately…instead of doing work while at work lol I bet the swap will be great. Does candy ever TRULY expire? I think no. 😉

        Liked by 1 person

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