Apparently, monkeys aren’t the only ones that have a vendetta against me that happens to be the size of all the Kardashian butts combined. Since dogs have joined the club.

Welcome to this week’s WTF Wednesday and for once this ish ain’t funny. 

I’ll get straight to the point. I mentioned yesterday about how a fellow blogger recommend the Concrete Angel song to me and how December didn’t start as beautifully as it was supposed to. So. Well.

I got chased by two stray dogs while I was doing my warm up jog. And I was on the phone with John and talking books and TV shows, normal and random things blogger pals talk about, when I felt something wet and pointy against my calf. When I looked down, it was a drooling black Devil dog, trying to bite/lick/make out with my leg, y’all.

image
This situation isn't even funny.

I think I screamed loud enough to puncture John’s eardrums. I’m so sorry Johnny, I didn’t mean to be a banshee. But you see, there was a Devil dog attacking me!

I’ve never run so fast in my life. And what’s scary is there were people at the park. They saw me scream and run. Argh!

Thank God for kind people, though.
This kindly old gentlemen explained to me that the doggies only wanted to lick my facie (face). And maybe if I had bickie (biscuit) with me it would be okay! And he shooed the dog away. I thanked him profusely while sweating profusely as well, for ten whole minutes while John heard the whole entire conversion (read: screaming and heart attack) and laughed like a madman at my sorry butt.

He’s a meanie. I believe I need new blogger besties.

And for Christmas, I want eyes on the back of my head so doggies and piggies and monkeys don’t attack me. When I got home I asked my hyper critical mum if I smell like food or socks or anything that might attract stray animals. She literally ROFLTAO**-ed for what seemed like forever and finally calmed down to reassure me that I don’t.

Which is confusing because I smell nice and things come at me. I’m never going back to that park again. I’ll find a new place to jog in. Such a sad life.

**ROFLTAO – Rolling on the floor laughing that arse off.

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30 thoughts on “WTF Wednesday – #21

      1. People, like dogs, have to learn to socialize with each other… sounds like the pup you met was trying out his social skills… poor baby. You probably scared it more than you were scared….

        Try to meet them halfway; usually they’re pretty amenable creatures, simple to figure out… Now, monkeys, they’re tough… too human.

        gigoid

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Even easier; they were probably best buds, looking for some scritches behind the ears…. Dogs seldom have any bad agenda, and they can always be distracted by food. Like the gentleman told you, carry a biscuit or two, show it to them, then toss it, and take off. They’ll go for the food every time….

        😉

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Actually, pits are very friendly, even goofy, when raised right. It’s only the dogs whose owners fail to train them correctly that become overly aggressive. It is usually NOT the animal’s fault when they are like that. The breed actually make excellent family pets; it’s all in how they’re raised…. The breed became popular among people who know nothing about animals, and were just training them to fight or be guard dogs, so their reputation got sullied thereby.

        There are only really a couple breeds of dog who can’t be well socialized… the Chow is very temperamental & hard to train to be social, and German Shepherds now are getting inbred, so they become unreliable when older…

        I’ve had, and loved many dogs in my life; they are indeed Mankind’s best friend, and actually can teach us a lot about ethics, and morality, because, unless they are taught to be bad, they will be good…. They love us more than they love themselves, as a rule….

        Get to know them, you’ll fall for them…

        gigoid

        Like

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