Dear You,

I know I write to you every Valentine’s Day and crib about the same thing, over and over. Begging you to come find me. And then begging you to stay. This Valentine’s Day? Not so much – I guess I’m probably on the fence and that I might change my mind come February 14th but right now? I don’t want you here. 

I just want you gone. Whoever you are, whatever you pretend to be, whatever you led me on to believe. I can’t do this. Going to extremes to convince myself that you’d show up one day and sweep me off my tired feet when we both know you won’t. Valentine’s Day pretty much sucks and I’m tired of waiting. It’s a struggle, trying to hold back your tears and not cry when you feel like there’s an elephant sitting on your heart and it might explode anytime. 

I see you. I know you’re in love with other things. I will never make it to your priority list. You’d never buy me flowers, let alone take me out to dinner. I don’t deserve that is what you think and I don’t even want to know you anymore. You led me on to believe that I was maybe worth a shot and then you just left me hanging in there barely. Just by a thread maybe. Well, guess what? That thread is now fraying, and will give away before you know it. 

I don’t believe in you anymore. I don’t believe in love and most importantly, I don’t believe in myself. 

No longer yours, 

Me. 

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20 thoughts on “Pink Blues

  1. I am responding to your story. I do not wish to assume it is you. The post is outstanding! I think you are about to reach a significant point. Your life will be much better. You are perfectly expressing how many people feel. Breaking away from the burden of desired love and relationship will free you to finally experience it all.
    In response to you…..I believe in you.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank you. Your life is bigger than temporary ups and downs. Please be at peace and enjoy. I found that once I let go of desires those things I wanted came to me. It’s a wonderful world and our experiences are gold. You’ll always have a believer in Michigan

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Be not dismayed, little one. Love is always; it is just we are not always ready to let it into our perception. I think you’ll discover, as your friend Henry notes, when you give up the unreasonable expectations forced on us by all the crap we hear from those who only wish to sell us a line, you will free yourself to experience the true thing. I have found, in my long life, love comes to us when we are complete within ourselves, without the need to be anything but ourself. This makes us much more attractive to others, for they can see our strength of spirit….

    Just be the best person you can be, and the rest will follow…

    And, remember, I’ll be here, as will your other friends….

    Love

    gigoid

    Liked by 1 person

      1. As soon as you can stop worrying about that, you’ll find them all around you. An ancient Greek once noted “Happiness and freedom depend on one principle. Some things are within your control, and some things are not.”

        Our own nature is the only thing we can actually make changes to in reality; once we understand and accept that, we can stop worrying about changing what is around us (i.e., other people). Every time we can do this, we will find ourselves to be content, and love will be right there, inside us, and more recognizable to others…. When you try too hard to affect reality, or others, it doesn’t work well, and we find ourselves struggling…

        Just be yourself; you are just fine the way you are…. A little patience, with yourself, and the world, is called for….

        Love, always

        gigoid

        Like

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